Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Memorise: "House and riches are the inheritance of fathers: and a prudent wife is from the LORD" (Prov 19:14)
Read: Genesis 29:11-20
11 And Jacob kissed Rachel, and lifted up his voice, and wept.
12 And Jacob told Rachel that he was her father's brother, and that he was Rebekah's son: and she ran and told her father.
13 And it came to pass, when Laban heard the tidings of Jacob his sister's son, that he ran to meet him, and embraced him, and kissed him, and brought him to his house. And he told Laban all these things.
14 And Laban said to him, Surely thou art my bone and my flesh. And he abode with him the space of a month.
15 ¶ And Laban said unto Jacob, Because thou art my brother, shouldest thou therefore serve me for nought? tell me, what shall thy wages be?
16 And Laban had two daughters: the name of the elder was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel.
17 Leah was tender eyed; but Rachel was beautiful and well favoured.
18 And Jacob loved Rachel; and said, I will serve thee seven years for Rachel thy younger daughter.
19 And Laban said, It is better that I give her to thee, than that I should give her to another man: abide with me.
20 And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her.
Courtship is a time to get to know each other - your strengths and weaknesses, likes and dislikes. It is also a time to be acquainted with the families of both partners. It is a time to plan the marriage. In some churches, long courtship of not less than two years is encouraged with the hope that with such time input, the couple will get to know each other quite well. But long courtship is not advisable because it can easily expose the partners to sexual temptation. Also, it has been discovered that there is a difference between courtship and real marriage. Some people pretend throughout the period of courtship, but reveal their true character after they have said 'I do'. One very important thing that must be done during this period is to obtain the parents' consent. If the sister's parents refuse to give their daughter to the brother, the couple should respect that decision and prayerfully approach the matter. It is wrong to go ahead with the marriage when consent has not been obtained. It amounts to stealing someone's daughter! How would you feel if a man without your consent forcefully takes and weds your daughter? You would feel terrible. Unfortunately, some homes are products of stolen daughters. If you stole another man's daughter, go and restitute. If not, apart from opening a door for curses to operate in your family, be ready to lose your daughters to men you detest.
Moreover, the courting couple must undertake marriage counselling lessons. This will guide them on how to live the married life. One issue that is very pertinent on the journey into marriage is the dowry (Exo 22:17). During the native law and custom ceremony, apart from providing the items on the list given you by the parents of the lady (with the exception of alcohol and any fetish thing), you will be required to pay the dowry. Without paying this, your marriage is not valid. Today, some couples have been living together for years. Some even have several children from that union yet they have not paid the dowry and fulfilled the obligations of a true marriage. Such people are living in fornication! They are not yet married! If you are in such a situation, see your pastor or senior pastor for counselling. You need to go and ratify that marriage so that you will stop being a fornicator. Besides, if you are born again but have not ratified this, the enemy will constantly use it as a legal ground to torment or attack you and withhold your blessings.
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